This post could have been several posts

The last few weeks have totally blown past my self-imposed 1hr time limit on blog posts, so it’s time to rein things in a bit and present some undigested and undifferentiated language thoughts. These are the sorts of things that could plausibly be social media posts, were I actually doing those. A sort of Notes & Queries version of a blog post. So:

• I think “shampoo” should be a polite term for a fart, and “detergent” should have been a brand name for a Victorian-era Mace spray.

• I like how “hangry” has become a term in common English use, and I wish there was something akin to “you’re welcome / I’m sorry” for cases where someone mentions something that’s attractive but ultimately a bad idea. Like when someone tells me that Sidecar Doughnuts has the Passionfruit Pavlova back on their seasonal menu, I want them to follow up with “you’re welcome / I’m sorry.” Or perhaps I could say something like “thank you / that’s too bad”. The cleanest portmanteau for welcome/sorry is “worry,” which would just be confusing since it already has a clear meaning. In German I think you could do it with “schitte” (schade/bitte).

• My intrusive thought is that I always expect the word “vinegar” to be pronounced with a long i and strong emphasis on the middle syllable, à la Denzel Washington in Training Day. I do not have plans to pronounce it that way myself.

• It’s odd how a standing joke and a running joke are the same thing.*

• There should have been a post-WWII road safety poster with the slogan: Reckless? Wreck more!

• When you accomplish something but it’s super annoying and exploitative (think Ticketmaster purchase), it’s a “suckcess.”

That’s all for now. Have a good weekend!

* I can thank Wednesday’s Connections puzzle for sparking this particular mental connection.